I've been a very, very good operating system this year. I may have been around for decades, but I've worked hard to keep up with the latest in technological advances. Admittedly, that's easier for me than for the other operating systems, since I was born with a TIMI*. I've been especially nice to my brothers, AIX and Linux, since we moved in together last year. I've even worked very hard to learn to play nicely with my more distant relatives like Windows, Mac and even mainframes. I'm not at all jealous of the younger kids in the family, like iPhone and Blackberry, because they just make for more interesting ways for people to interact with me.
Because I've been such a good operating system, I hope you can leave a few things under my tree this Christmas.
1. A little respect.
It would be really nice if my family (IBM) paid me a little more respect. I feel like the Rodney Dangerfield of computing. Mum Rochester is pretty good to me most of the time, but Daddy Armonk and my brothers and sisters just don't "get" me. Even though I'm a major part of the IT infrastructure of most of the Fortune 500 companies, every time anyone except Mum goes to visit them they try to have me kicked out and one of the other kids (or even worse that snotty brat from Redmond) come in to replace me! I wouldn't feel so bad about it except I know that 99-percent of the time my replacement will end up breaking their hearts and costing them way more money than I would if only they'd give me a chance.
2. I'd like to come out of the closet.
No, not the metaphorical one--the real one that I'm often hidden away in. You must have heard those stories about where nobody knew where I was or what I did until one day they accidentally disconnected my power. I want to come out into the open. I know I'm different, and I'm proud of it. I just wish my family could be as proud of me as my friends are. I am delighted when my friends shout loud they use IBM i and are proud of it! If only my family would do the same.
I want to be taken seriously by the management of the companies that I slave away for. I want them to realize that if I am "old fashioned," then it's often their fault for failing to let their programmers update my applications. I get really, really tired of hearing my programmers bemoaning the fact that they are never allowed to try anything new.
3. Something for my friends.
I have lots of friends, too many for me to give them all presents individually. But with your help I could at least give a little something to the RPGers. Many of them have learned to write modern Web applications, but others are still reluctant to do things that aren't "RPG." If you could help me by putting a great big bow on the RPG "Open I/O" project so that they could play with it in the new year. I think that would go a long way toward helping them with their New Year's resolutions to lose a few pounds of unsightly green screens.
4. A name that I can hold on to for a while
I've been around long enough to know that a name--and brand--recognition is very important. Unfortunately, Mum and Dad keep giving me new names over and over again, maybe in hopes that I'll fit in better with the rest of the family. But as a result, I (and my friends who know me) are suffering from an identity crisis. Worse, my friends end up arguing with each other about what my name is, when they could be using that energy to find new and better ways to use me. I'd like a name that sticks. Even a clever nickname or a catchy slogan would be nice.
Thanks for listening, Santa. I hope you, Mrs. Claus, the elves and reindeer are well. If you need help keeping track of all the naughty and nice kids in the world, that's a perfect application for DB2 for i. I'm sure one of my friends would be happy to build you an application with a nice user interface you could even access via your iPhone while on your journey.
IBM i (aka i5, System i, iSeries, AS/400...)
* Technology Independent Machine Interface